A sequel to ‘Passion’?

A sequel to ‘Passion’?

An editorial cartoon shows two men facing the cross and asking, “Why is Mel Gibson smiling since the critics crucified him?”

In the background is a long line of people heading in to see the movie, “The Passion.”

Rumor mills have it that now Hollywood is tired of Mel’s blood and is now smelling Mel’s money in religious movies. So don’t be surprised if you soon see Hollywood putting out “Passion II,” for they do have a passion for money.

Here’s the way I figure they’ll cast it. Since Sean Penn just took home an Oscar, they will have him play the part of Christ. (Second choice will be Jack Nicholson.) Elizabeth Taylor will make a comeback as Mary, the mother of Jesus. Look for Madonna to star as Mary Magdalene. Judas will probably be a singing Ruben Studdard. The disciples will be some heavy metal rock band with a bunch of rappers who refuse to take the rap for Jesus.

And since God forbid that they offend anyone, the movie will be staged where the evangelical Christians crucify Jesus. (Who cares if you offend evangelicals?)

Soon to follow will be “Adam and Eve” with Pee Wee Herman and Jane Fonda; “Moses” with Charlton Heston sporting a rifle instead of a rod; “David and Bathsheba” with Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake (you remember this dynamic duo from the Super Bowl).

And television is now trying to cash in on religion like money changers making a wild dash for the temple. “Judas” was ABC’s pitiful attempt on March 8.

Johnathon Schaech was the likeable Judas. Jonathan Scarfe was the tough guy Jesus for whom I did not care at all.  My attitude was that instead of casting the stone, they should have stoned the cast. Good grief, Jesus may not have been six foot four, but He was no punk.

“The Da Vinci Code” (yep, I read it) reduces Jesus to a shyster who didn’t die for the sins of the world, was not the Messiah, married Mary Magdalene and their offspring are the true children of God!

That’s enough to make Jesus want to come back a little early and do some spring housecleaning.

Hollywood, I had just as soon you stay out of religious movies, unless you get some theological guidance from someone like Mel Gibson or Billy Graham or even a good old country preacher. 

I’m not holding my breath till then, but I will repeat what I sent as an e-mail to Mel Gibson: “Dear Mel, it’s been a long time since a Baptist preacher thanked a Catholic for something. But thank you.”

Bob Curlee
Birmingham, Ala.