By Jeffery M. Leonard, Ph.D.
Associate Professor of Biblical Studies, Samford University
Honor Parents
Exodus 20:12, 2 Samuel 15:7–14
If you’ve ever had occasion to journey “across the Pond,” you can likely attest to the truth of George Bernard Shaw’s maxim, “The United States and Great Britain are two countries separated by a common language.” Pass through Heathrow, and you enter a world of crisps (chips), chips (fries), biscuits (cookies), candyfloss (cotton candy), lorries (trucks), boots (trunks), lifts (elevators) and a thousand other “foreign” (for an American, at least) terms. What is true of traveling east to England is doubly true of traveling back to the centuries that first produced our English Bibles. So many terms that populate the pages of Scripture have fallen out of favor in our modern dialects.
Outside of church or a Bible study, when was the last time you used a term like glory, bless, sovereign, lordship, wicked or judgment? These are words that used to be part and parcel of everyday speech. Now, though, they are hardly used, or if they are used, they are used in a fashion quite different from their original meaning.
Another word that could be added to this roster of “old fashioned” biblical terms is the word “honor.” We still take note of “honors” like being valedictorian or winning an MVP award. We rarely speak, though, of giving “honor” (singular) to a person. We hardly know what it means to give honor to a person or even to give honor to God. Part of the reason this concept of honor is so foreign to us is that it derives from a time when society was highly stratified. Those on the lower rungs of wealth and status were expected to treat those higher up as their betters. Thankfully, the spread of democratic ideals has served to erase much of that stratification of society.
But what was a gain in our politics has also been a loss in our theology. The truth is that we are on the bottom rung when it comes to our relationship with our Creator, and that same Creator deserves to be honored as much now as He did before 1776.
Honor the parents God has placed in your life. (Ex. 20:12)
The fifth commandment is quite clear in its instruction — there are those we should honor, namely our parents. Of course, not every parent deserves honor. To honor an abusive parent or a parent who abandons his or her children would simply be to offer up a lie. True honor is honor that is deserved. That is why David’s prayer in 1 Chronicles 16:29 says, “Ascribe to the Lord the honor due his name.” To honor someone is to recognize the commendation that person truly does deserve.
Honor acts with truthfulness and integrity towards parents. (2 Sam. 15:7–12)
The Bible offers various examples of children who honor and, sadly, who dishonor their parents. An example of the latter is found in the life of Absalom. Absalom’s father David was by no means a perfect man. David’s affair with Bathsheba and his murder of Uriah were grievous sins, and it is no surprise that the great king’s family began to fall apart soon after these events. Even so, Absalom was wrong not to give his father the respect he did deserve. He was wrong not to acknowledge the good things David had done or to recognize the bitter tears of repentance the king had shed.
Honor seeks the welfare of parents. (2 Sam. 15:13–14)
When Absalom rebelled and forced David to flee, he acted in direct opposition to the idea of honoring one’s parents. Absalom cast aside whatever honor was due David and demanded instead that it be directed toward himself.
Sadly, the end of Absalom’s life was nearly a direct fulfillment of the words in the Decalogue. The fifth commandment promised long life to those who would honor their parents. Absalom did the opposite of this and achieved the opposite end. The young prince died in the very prime of his life.
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