By Jay T. Robertson, Ph.D.
Assistant Professor of Christian Studies, University of Mobile
Following God’s Design
Proverbs 5:3–11, 15–18
See the Reality (3–6)
Solomon warned his son about the danger of the immoral woman. Sexual immorality and adultery are rampant today. Lust is a big problem for men and women.
According to a 2018 report in “Psychology Today,” psychologists found that 73% of women and 98% of men reported internet pornography use in the last six months. According to Reuters, at least one in four teens are receiving explicit texts and emails, and at least one in seven are sending “sexts.”
We are all vulnerable. If you think you are above sexual temptation, you are in a dangerous place. We all need to maintain vigilance.
Solomon addressed this issue five times in the opening chapters of Proverbs (2:16–22; 5:3–23; 6:24–35; 7:5–27; 9:13–18). In chapter 5 the wise father said to his son: “You are going to be tempted. You are walking into a world of sexual foolishness. It will be offered to you as honey, and you will be attracted. But this honey will poison you.”
Honey is sweet. So whatever leaves a bitter aftertaste in your mouth is not actually honey. Do not be fooled. Do not judge by the appearances of the moment. The forbidden woman’s words may ooze seductive charm face-to-face, on the internet or in a text message. But the reality of the matter is her sweet words will turn to bitterness.
If you are a woman, you may think these verses are unfair. Men can be just as bad as women. That is certainly true. But no one text of Scripture can address every situation. And the Book of Proverbs warns about evil men too (1:10–19).
Think Long Term (7–11)
Solomon urged his sons to listen and to obey his teaching. “Keep your way far from her.” Do not tell yourself you can get involved a little and then get clear without anyone ever knowing. Do you think you can play with sin and keep it under control? Do you think you can compartmentalize God? Sexual sin complicates everything.
When we disobey God, our hearts harden. The other people we violate become hardened and embittered toward us because sooner or later they will find out too.
Solomon warned of the ruin and disgrace that accompany adultery. Sexual folly depletes a man financially in cover-ups, alimony and lawsuits, socially in his reputation, emotionally in his conscience and ultimately in his marriage. Jealousy, loneliness, hurt and regret are the companions of the sexually immoral. The cost of sexual sin is high.
The only true friend for sexual fools is Jesus Christ. The sexually immoral person needs to repent of his or her sin and trust in the completed work of Christ (1 Cor. 6:9–11). No one ever truly meets Jesus and stays the same.
Jesus has the power to transform the vilest of sinners. Hope exists for all who will turn from their sin and trust in Christ.
Enjoy God’s Provision (15–18)
Just as you drink from your own fountain, you should find your fulfillment in the love of your own wife. Solomon made an extended comparison between the water that supports physical life and the sexual intimacy that brings such zest to life.
As water satisfies a raging thirst, so a man should satisfy his sexual desires through lovemaking with his own wife and with no one else.
Note what God is not saying: “There is temptation in the world. You must have a will of iron to stay pure. You will live with frustration bottled up inside.” No.
God’s remedy for your thirst for sex is overflowing sexual joy with your wife. This is what Solomon referred to when he wrote “from your own cistern” and “from your own well.” Your wife is your own personal and private, divinely approved wellspring of endless sexual satisfaction.
Sex within the covenant of marriage is for the glory of God and the good of humanity.
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