Explore the Bible By Jay T. Robertson, Ph.D.
Assistant Professor of Christian Studies, University of Mobile
LIVING IN RELATIONSHIP
1 Peter 3:1–12
For the Wife (1–6)
While this command is quite controversial today, it is important for believers to understand every Christian is under authority. God ordained a hierarchy of authority for our good. When we submit to Him and obey His rules, life works best. We all must be under if we ever hope to be over. Submission is not just for wives, but for every Jesus follower.
For a Christian wife to have a different religion than her husband was astonishing for that culture. In “Advice to the Bride and Groom,” the Greek historian Plutarch said: “A wife should not acquire her own friends, but should make her husband’s friends her own. The gods are the first and most significant friends. For this reason, it is proper for a wife to recognize only those gods whom her husband worships.” Even though Peter commands wives to submit to their husbands, it was a different submission than was common in that culture. The wives’ devotion was first and foremost to Christ.
If a wife has an unbelieving husband who is not obedient to the gospel, she should not try to pressure him or nag him into the Kingdom. Rather, her Christ-like living in the home will testify without a word to the truth of the gospel.
It is very important to define submission biblically. Submission is the divine calling of the wife to honor and affirm her husband’s leadership and help carry it through according to her gifts. Submission is a matter of order, not of value (1 Cor. 11:3). Submission of the wife is a voluntary act (Eph. 5:22). The husband is never granted the authority to make his wife submit to his leadership. Submission has its limits (v. 6). If the husband orders his wife to disobey a command of Scripture, then she is to obey God rather than her husband.
For the Husband (7)
While the wife should submit herself to her husband, the husband should serve his wife. Headship is the divine calling of the husband to take primary responsibility for Christ-like servant leadership, protection and provision in the home. To “live with your wives in an understanding way” focuses on living in accord with God’s will, which includes understanding the needs of your wife.
Typically, men are stronger than women and may be tempted to threaten their wives through physical or verbal abuse. Men and women share equal destiny as “heirs … of the grace of life.” Peter does not think women are inferior to men, for both are equally made in God’s image. If husbands do not treat their wives in a godly way, the Lord will not answer their prayers.
For All Believers (8–12)
The gospel transforms relationships. In these verses Peter provides a list of godly virtues that all Jesus followers are called to exemplify at all times. Believers should get along with others for the sake of Christ, care deeply about the needs and sorrows of others, love one another as a family, be sensitive to the needs of others and consider others as more important.
In verses 10–12, Peter utilizes Psalm 34:12–16 to drive home his point. This psalm focuses on suffering and the Lord’s deliverance of the righteous and His judgment of the wicked. Peter is not promising good days in this world since persecution and troubles are to be expected. God is working out His plan in your life, but it rarely works out the way you imagined it. To love life and see good days is the result of the “blessing” of God in one’s life. The ultimate “blessing” the righteous long for will be realized only in the future in the presence of Christ.
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