A few nights each week, David Sefton, a junior at Chicago’s Moody Bible Institute, and 25–30 other students try to build relationships with the homeless. They strike up conversations about anything, from sports to spirituality to what’s on the menu at the nearby homeless shelter.
As a general rule, they don’t give money to those they meet, unless they know of a specific need, like a bus pass or medicine, or know the person and really trust him or her.
“I don’t know what I’m supporting, and I know that … drugs and alcohol … are a big problem on the streets,” Sefton said.
Sometimes the students pass out sandwiches, but Sefton said the focus of their work is less on providing physical needs and more on rebuilding shattered self-image.
After being ignored and avoided, Sefton said, “your dignity gets pretty shot.”
But a young man several states away from Sefton couldn’t be ignored recently when he walked into a Sunday night worship service at tiny Kilgore Baptist Church, Dora, in Sulphur Springs Baptist Association.
The church only averages between 20 and 30 in attendance each Sunday, and that night, there were only 10 people in the sanctuary.
The stranger stuck out like a sore thumb.
“I’ve got three girls that sing, and they had just got to singing when he actually walked in and sat down and just sort of rested his head on the back of the bench,” Pastor Kerry Turner said. “I went back there just to introduce myself, and he asked if he could talk to me outside, and he spilled what was on his heart.”
The man eventually asked Turner for money for gas to get him to a shelter in Birmingham. Instead of handing him $10, Turner and deacon Billy Waldrep followed him to a gas station right then and there and filled his tank.
According to T. Renee Albracht, who works with campus security at Belmont University in Nashville and has a master’s in social work from the University of Tennessee in Knoxville, this is precisely what they should have done.
Though experiencing an interruption of a church service is an unusually confrontational example of solicitation, it is not unique, especially at this time of year, Albracht said.
Like Sefton, she insists that giving cash to those asking for handouts is often counterproductive.
“I purposely refrain from carrying cash … I can honestly say, ‘I’m sorry. I don’t have any money, but … I’ll gladly buy you something to eat.’ I have only had one person take me up on this offer.”
When asked for gas money, Albracht takes the same approach.
“I have offered to fill up the tank and pay for it when I pay for my gas. They decline,” she said. “My husband has asked to see the person’s vehicle. He would inspect the gas gauge only to find that they had almost a full tank.”
Albracht warns that such an approach, rather than simply giving someone cash, is often met with acerbic behavior, especially if the need is not authentic.
This was not the case at Kilgore Baptist.
“I witnessed to him after we gave him the gas and everything and got to talk to him for a little bit. He said he was tired of living his life; he wanted some help,” Turner said.
They haven’t heard from the man again, but Turner said they feel they made a difference in his life and they are praying for him.
According to Albracht, if someone is really in need, like this man, then he or she will not turn down help.
If someone is only interested in cash and is refused, Albracht said he or she may try to convince you to give something by saying,
- “I don’t want to put you out.”
- “I don’t want to be a burden.”
- “If you don’t have a dollar, I’ll take anything you do have. Twenty-five cents?”
- “I don’t trust shelters.”
Albracht said to show caution, but Rick Warren, pastor of Saddleback Church, Lake Forest, Calif., added that you shouldn’t forget to show respect.
“God has favorites … The Bible clearly says God’s favorites are the poor — the ones who get stomped on, ignored and bypassed,” Warren said.
Don’t assume you know the reason that they’re poor, he said. “Get to know a person by asking, ‘Would you tell me your story?’ The Bible says in Romans 12:16, ‘Give the same consideration to everyone alike. Pay no regard to social standing but meet humble people on their own terms.’”
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