As children enter kindergarten, parents often get their first hint of what life will be like once the kids leave home for good. This transition may serve as a persecutor to the empty nest, and how parents deal with it can be good preparation for coping later.
Barbara Barber, principal of Cottage Hill Baptist School in Mobile, said whether the feelings invoked by sending children to kindergarten mimic those associated with the empty nest often depends on how many children there are in the family.
“If they have [other, younger] children they’re usually ready for [the older children] to spread their wings,” she said.
But for parents who are sending their youngest off to school, that transition can be especially difficult. Barbara said teachers and administrators pay attention to verbal and nonverbal cues from parents that the transition is proving to be a challenge.
Sometimes, according to Barber, parents communicate it directly. But reluctance to let go of a child at the classroom door or walking the child to the classroom daily might be indicators.
Separation anxiety on the part of the parent, child or both also may indicate that the parent is struggling. “If the child is still crying, sometimes they’re picking up on the mom’s insecurity of not being able to release them,” Barbara said.
To help parents cope, Barbara said the school actively tries to solicit parents to volunteer on campus. “Parents particularly want to know how their children are fitting in.”
Helping out in the classroom gives them a bird’s –eye view of their child’s life at school and helps the parent finds thing to discuss with their student after school is out. “It’s bridging the gap.”
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