How well do you know your pastor?

What Pastors Wish Church Members Knew

Too often, today’s church member perceives a pastor to be a strong, almost superhuman spiritual leader — a kind of “spiritual superman” — who has his life, faith and family all together. He or she believes this spiritual superman worked through all his personal and professional problems long ago and now possesses few inadequacies, fears, disappointments or unrealized expectations.

Church members listen with confidence to their pastor’s sermons on Sunday mornings. When they have a question, they expect him to always have the right answer. When they experience crises, they rush to him for help.

How often do church members purposely look beyond the superspiritual image and see their pastor’s heart? How often do they realize that he, too, is a vulnerable human being? And like other human beings, he experiences hurts, temptations, struggles and tragedies in his own life and family.

A crisis is happening in the pulpits of our churches today. Many of our pastors are suffering in silence from physical exhaustion, stress, loneliness, emotional scars, spiritual burnout and disillusionment. Many have a lack of money, friends, time and confidence.

Many pastors have troubled marriages, hurting children and strained relationships with co-workers and church members. Some are afraid of being fired, afraid their faith has dried up and afraid they don’t have what it takes to keep their church alive. Because of these insecurities, many pastors are leaving the ministry. Pastors — by the thousands each year — are abandoning their pulpits disappointed, disgusted, worn-out and deeply wounded.

How well do you know your pastor? To whom does he reveal his innermost fears, temptations, inadequacies and personal and spiritual struggles?

If Christians can better understand their pastors and the pressures most face in their role as a shepherd, then they can reach out with love to support their pastor and his family.

Over the next 10 weeks, you’ll meet pastors from Alabama and across the nation who will speak anonymously about the concerns and challenges of being a pastor in today’s society. Their responses are often raw and gritty, starkly realistic and uncomfortably honest. Their revelations may shock and concern you, but know this: How the average church member perceives his or her pastor is, more often than not, a far cry from the reality of what the pastor actually feels, believes and experiences.

A recent nationwide survey was taken of hundreds of pastors of all ages and church sizes. Almost every pastor shared the same joys and expectations, dealt with the same problems and frustrations and experienced the same concerns about family and finances. They held common goals, hopes and dreams for their churches. Most of these pastors loved their ministries but had faced almost unbearable hardships within the church they served.

The pastors’ responses will give today’s church member a better understanding of and appreciation for today’s pastor. Because of the responses, church members will be better equipped to minister to their pastor.

Denise George is the author of ‘What Pastors Wish Church Members Knew’  and numerous other books. Denise and her husband, Timothy George (founding dean of Beeson Divinity School), are members of Shades Mountain Baptist Church. For more information, visit www.authordenisegeorge.com.