Annelle Bishop is a great lady of whom I am exceedingly proud. She is a lady of firsts.
In the 1940s she started Alabama’s first school for licensed practical nurses in Gadsden. She was the first female chairman of the board of the Alabama Heart Association back in the early 1960s. She, along with other nurses from Baptist Health System, started the school of nursing at Jefferson State Junior College in 1965. In 1966 she was named the first vice president in charge of nursing service for the newly established Baptist Medical Center, Montclair, in Birmingham.
Everyone who knew her knew she cared about people. It was in her blood.
She would walk the halls of the hospital and visit patients every day, making for long, 12- to 14-hour days. I am exceedingly proud to call this angel of mercy my mother.
It seems just like yesterday when I would see her at Baptist Montclair checking to make sure patients and staff were getting what they needed. She not only loved her work and those she worked with but also she loved and still loves her family. In Mother’s retirement years, she has loved her grandchildren and enjoyed many hours with them.
During the last two years things began to change, not just for Mom, but for my Dad, my family and me.
It was just over two years ago that my father had a severe lung condition that led to a 91-day stay in the hospital. It was during that time that we began to see strange changes in Mom.
At first we thought it was the stress she was under during Dad’s illness. Things we noticed included her increasing forgetfulness. Her short-term memory became dramatically reduced. She started repeating herself and it became increasingly difficult for her to make any sort of decision. She could not remember what the physicians were telling her about my father’s condition.
During this time, I began to assist her in making sure bills were paid and her house was kept in order. While at her home one night, we worked together to write checks for three bills that were due.
In a few weeks, the bank statement came back and she saw where I had signed three checks. What Mom couldn’t remember was that these were the checks that we together had written to pay bills just two weeks before.
Mom became extremely paranoid and accusing, stating that she couldn’t believe that I was writing checks on her account.
I tried to explain that I was only paying her bills but she couldn‘t understand. It was terribly painful for me to see my mother accuse me of trying to swindle her.
What I didn’t know was that Mom was in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease and that paranoia can be one of the symptoms of Alzheimer’s. I had to learn not to take her paranoia personally.
While Dad was still in the hospital, my aunt helped me by taking Mother to her physician. He ran some tests, evaluated her symptoms and diagnosed her with early stages of Alzheimer’s.
This diagnosis came as a relief to me because it allowed me to understand her behavior.
Two years have now passed. Mom has done well on medications for Alzheimer’s but she has continued a slow decline. She is more childlike. She has begun to see me as a parent figure and she is no longer paranoid about anything that I do in assisting her.
Dad’s health is still very poor but he does all he can to help her. Living just around the corner, I check on my folks on a regular basis.
Mom no longer initiates much conversation with me but simply listens and responds to what she can understand.
I so enjoy reminiscing with her about old times. I have found that it is a great time of sharing love.
For Mother’s Day I gave Mom a little china tea set. She told me many times that she had one as a child but that it had fallen and broke into many pieces. With her family being desperately poor they could not afford to replace it. It had been her most treasured possession during her childhood. When I presented her with the little tea set, she radiated like a child at Christmas.
Recently Mom and Dad accompanied my family on a trip to the coast. They seemed to enjoy it so much. Sadly, Mom forgot the trip just a day after we got back. But I am learning to enjoy the moment and cherish each memory. I have spent time with Mom talking to her about the trip and what we did together as a family. Through these memory exercises she has developed a few memory fragments of the trip.
I am looking forward to more good times like these before the later stages of the disease take over. It’s important for me to think of things that might trigger her memory of certain events. I love it when she says, “Oh, I can remember that.”
Bishop is director of senior programs at Baptist Health System.
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