“Wow, this isn’t a homeless shelter,” single mother Alisha Readus joyfully exclaimed when she first arrived at the Family Care home of Alabama Baptist Children’s Homes & Family Ministries (ABCH) in Alabaster.
In the five months that followed, Children’s Homes houseparents Linda and James Haynes coached Readus while she and her five small children lived at the Family Care home.
The first client in the newest ministry of the ABCH, Readus came with exceptionally strong determination but lacked direction.
Her top goal was to not go back to the “’hood,” and that included her refusal to apply for government housing.
“I don’t put people down for living in the projects,” Readus said. “I just want better for my kids.”
When Readus began to allow God to change her thought process, her actions began to change, she said.
Life-changing program
“I truthfully don’t want to remember the Alisha I was before I came to Family Care.”
Readus is one of three single mothers helped at the Alabaster home since the Family Care ministry began in early 2002.
An ABCH maternity home ministry existed at the site of the Family Care home prior to 2002.
Family Care is a “stepping stone to help each single mother get on her feet” financially, emotionally and spiritually without separation from her children, according to Children’s Homes social worker Jennifer Harvey Ervin.
While most clients and their dependent children come from homeless shelters, Family Care welcomes referrals from churches and other sources.
Many homeless shelters, especially in the Birmingham area, are crowded with single mothers with children, Ervin reported.
“We have a society full of single mothers who don’t have the education required to get high-paying jobs,” she said.
“Many women have watched their parents live on government help and they don’t know anything else,” Ervin continued. “With new welfare laws, however, a woman can no longer depend on the government for longer than five years in her lifetime.”
Ervin added that Family Care’s aim is independence for the women they serve,
“In the Family Care ministry of the Children’s Homes, we don’t hold each mother’s hand step by step,” she said. “Instead, we encourage her to independently develop a plan while we provide support as needed.”
Each client and her child or children live in the downstairs apartment while the Hayneses live upstairs.
The Hayneses advise — but don’t lead — each mother in finding full-time employment. Each secures work and is required to put at least 30 percent of every paycheck in savings.
Most of the women who come to Family Care have never learned to save money because they have always struggled just to pay their bills or have always survived on what little they’ve received in government welfare, Ervin says.
Two Family Care clients have saved enough money to buy cars with cash.
“Most of the time, clients come to us with terrible credit and to pay cash for their cars is the only way,” Ervin said.
“In the process of saving money and paying for household necessities on their own, we see many mothers’ self-confidence grow,” she said.
Each client and her child or children are allowed to stay at the Alabaster home for up to six months.
Practical skills
The Hayneses teach the single mother to develop a budget and effective parenting skills, establish daily schedules and manage a household.
Some of Linda Haynes’ most practical advice comes during the weekly, casual conversations she has with each mother at her request.
“We help each mother to develop structure in her life by teaching her to tend to little tasks that could become big burdens if neglected,” Linda Haynes said.
She added, “James and I coach each mother through things like paying bills as soon as she receives them.”
For more information, contact the Alabama Baptist Children’s Homes & Family Ministries at 1-888-720-8805.
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