Park in the back, sit in the front” has become a familiar saying around Robertsdale’s Bethel Baptist Church in the past few months as the church adjusts for increasing attendance on Sunday mornings.
However, when Pastor Harvey Earls met 87-year-old Thelma Middleton walking through the gym toward the sanctuary with her walker, he had to laugh.
“She said, ‘I parked in the back,’” Earls recalled.
That willingness to make visitors feel appreciated is a major factor in the growth at Bethel Baptist, Earls said.
“Our folks really welcome people. They are very good at receiving visitors and showing the love of Christ to the ‘strangers’ who arrive each Sunday,” he said.
In his three years as pastor of Bethel, Earls has not preached or held classes on hospitality. It’s just something the people practice.
Not every church can say that. Talk to anyone who has visited new churches frequently and you will probably hear a story about being asked to move out of someone’s seat or having to take a seat on the front row because the regular worshippers had filled up the back rows.
A welcoming attitude is biblical, however, and it can be cultivated even in those whose spiritual gift may not be hospitality, said Lisa Keane, clinical director at Pathways Professional Counseling.
“Can people learn to be more welcoming? I believe the answer is ‘yes’ — because of the gospel and because of what Christ did for us. These two motivators can help people learn to exhibit all sorts of behaviors that may not come naturally,” Keane said.
As a college student Keane worked on staff at a church in Auburn. Though the church welcomed a new group of college students each fall, the congregation was quite closed to allowing new people into the established groups. A major staff overhaul changed that.
“The church transformed because the new leaders led by example in order to help people learn to be more welcoming,” Keane said. “They put people who were more naturally welcoming in leadership positions across the church landscape. When hospitality became a greater part of the church culture, those that were not so good at it were more likely to join in welcoming others.”
In his book “Signs of Life: Back to the Basics of Authentic Christianity,” pastor and author David Jeremiah writes that while a believer’s commitment to the Lord is often most obvious in private moments of prayer or Bible study, our public moments have great significance, especially on those who don’t know us well.
‘It’s by our smile’
“They see us from across the street, across the fence, across the hall, across the office, across the miles or across the pews,” he writes. “How do these people recognize that we are God’s ambassadors? It’s by our smile … our friendliness … our benevolence.”
Those same attributes appeal to church visitors, especially as economic, religious, ethnic and political differences continue to divide our culture. Through the prophet Isaiah, the Lord says His house shall be called a “house of prayer for all peoples” (Isa. 56:7). But the message of inclusion and hospitality grows more and more difficult as society becomes increasingly fragmented, according to Henry G. Brinton, author of “The Welcoming Congregation: Roots and Fruits of Christian Hospitality.” In response, the Christian community must counter the impulse to close ranks around those who are like them and instead continually look for ways to include those who are new and different in the life of the church.
“Hospitality is the key to becoming an uncommon Christian community — one that embraces all people with God’s love and grace,” Brinton writes. “I am convinced that God wants — and the world needs — churches that are truly welcoming.”
Spiritual gift
While utilizing members with the spiritual gift of hospitality is important, teaching geared at the heart of the issue also is vital.
Keane said, “What keeps someone from being welcoming in the first place? Is it selfishness? Pride? Anxiety? Leaders can drill down into what is going on, but reminding your congregation that their role at church is to glorify God by making more disciples can be a great motivator.”
Part of discipleship is providing opportunities for new people to plug in, not just in ministry but in fellowship as well. Welcoming others into the group requires an intentional effort, Keane said. Though it is not always easy, it is biblical.
“Your selfishness to want only to spend time with your clique is simply contrary to what God has called us to,” Keane said. “You are called to step out, to make the gospel known in the halls of your church and beyond.”
A welcoming church cultivates a sense of mission and purpose among its members that in turn leads them to serve others, including the strangers in their midst, according to Brinton.
In order for the church to truly be a “house of prayer for all peoples,” he said, it must practice hospitality in such a way that “strangers will be welcomed into a place of acceptance, included in a network of relationships and given time and resources to grow in Christian faith and understanding.”
Spiritual growth
That kind of biblical hospitality draws people in and results in spiritual as well as numerical growth, Brinton concludes.
“People are attracted to congregations that put faith into action and radiate excitement about making a difference in the world.”
- Make sure each guest is greeted three times before sitting. Choose greeters who project warmth and smile readily.
- Don’t judge. Just don’t. Remember the Bible’s gradual unfolding of God’s “chosen people” to include first some Israelites, then all Israelites and then (under Jesus) all people, including those on the margins.
- Don’t barrage guests with pleas for money.
- Choose accessible hymns and songs.
- Make sure the bulletin spells out what guests need to do, including when the congregation sits, stands or joins together in prayer.
- Rather than singling out guests, have church members wear nametags or stand during the welcome time.
- During meals make sure newer members or guests are not sitting alone. Join them for food and conversation.
- Invite people to your home rather than to your church. Home-based ministry is an excellent way to practice hospitality.
- As a church be sure you are expending as many resources toward outreach as you are toward preserving your building, your traditions or your administration.
- Plan your ministries based on the actual needs of your neighborhood and community, not just on what other congregations are doing.
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