It is no secret that we live in a post-modern culture infected with feminism.
Traditional marriage, motherhood and homemaking are seen as oppressive prisons that women must escape. Young women are taught to passionately pursue their careers and climb the corporate ladder with little regard for marriage or children. Worth is measured by visibility and professional success.
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Sadly, this mindset has also infiltrated the Church. The quiet, daily work of the home is often treated as non-essential and less valuable compared to work done outside the home. The “real” work of ministry comes in the form of platforms, programs and public influence. The message is clear: being a wife and mother is great, but there is bigger, better, more important work to be done outside the home.
Yet, Scripture paints a very different picture.
God’s design
In Genesis 1:26–27, we are told that both men and women are created in the Imago Dei. Each is created with inherent dignity and value but with distinct and purposeful roles.
The man is called to lead, provide for, and shepherd his household with care and authority. The woman is given to the man as a “helper fit for him.” She is uniquely designed to come alongside him. She supports, nurtures and brings life and order to the home while willingly submitting to his leadership and authority.
We see this message clearly taught throughout Scripture — see 1 Corinthians 11:8–9 and 1 Timothy 2:13. God’s design for the family is not arbitrary but reflective of Christ’s relationship with the Church (Eph. 5:22–24); however, the fall has distorted our perception of God’s design. Rather than joyfully embracing the roles given to us, we are cursed to oppose them. We are dissatisfied with what we have been given and, thus, seek what we have not.
Mission of the home
The clearest and most direct instruction given to women regarding ministry is found in Titus 2:3–5. Older women, by age or by faith, are told to teach the younger to love and serve their husbands and children well while being sensible, pure, kind, workers at home, and submissive to their own husbands.
This model of discipleship is deeply relational and incredibly practical. It does not require formal study, planned events, or an intense theological education. It requires obedience to God’s Word and a willingness to open one’s life and home to another.
The Proverbs 31 woman (Prov. 31:10–31), often referred to as the “ideal woman,” is clearly rooted in the home. She is seen faithfully caring for her household, practicing hospitality, and stewarding her resources well. She prioritizes her family and works diligently to care for their needs. As a result of her dignified behavior, wisdom, kindness, and, most importantly, her fear of the Lord, she is praised and blessed by her husband and children.
In Deuteronomy 6:6–7, parents are instructed to teach God’s Word to their children diligently. This kind of discipleship happens in the normal rhythms of the day: while preparing meals, completing chores or schoolwork, around the kitchen table at mealtimes, and countless other unseen moments.
These commands are not small or incidental. They are central to God’s design and purpose. When women fail to see their homes as their primary mission field, the responsibility of these tasks is often neglected and delegated to others.
Hospitality: A means of gospel advancement
One of the most neglected practices of the modern Christian is hospitality.
When Paul lists the marks of a true Christian in Romans 12, we are told to “seek to show hospitality.” Peter reiterates this truth in 1 Peter 4:9 when he writes, “Show hospitality to one another without grumbling.”
This command is not optional; it’s essential to the Christian life. Rosaria Butterfield, author of The Gospel Comes with a House Key, wrote, “Those who live out radically, ordinary hospitality see their homes not as theirs at all but as God’s gift to use for the furtherance of His Kingdom.”
Whether it be for intentional discipleship, evangelism efforts, or community building, women are uniquely positioned to cultivate this kind of environment. By maintaining order and faithfully tending to the work of the home, women create stability where hospitality can be practiced joyfully.
When women are frequently and consistently being pulled away from the home, hospitality suffers.
When the care of the home is neglected, meals are rushed, and responsibilities are often unfairly shifted to other members of the household. Rather than the home being a sanctuary for peace and rest, it becomes a place of stress and chaos.
Faithfulness to the mission
Recovering the vision for the home does not require perfection but obedience and intentionality.
It means seeing the home as a constant and effective place of ongoing discipleship. A place where children are not separate from the mission but included in it, and wives embrace the calling given to them while helping their husbands fulfill the calling given to them.
One of the simplest, yet sometimes the most difficult, ways to begin is to order your schedule and home well. Prayerfully consider where your emphasis and priorities may be misfocused. Does your messy, chaotic home prevent you from practicing hospitality?
If a younger couple asked for counsel, would you need to panic clean or push them off entirely because your home is not ready to receive guests?
The wife must create rhythms and routines that allow for discipleship and hospitality to happen organically. Begin by cultivating a home that is welcoming, purposeful and steady, not reactive and chaotic. Cultivate a home where spouses are unified, children are discipled, guests are welcomed, the Gospel is shared, relationships are strengthened, and God is glorified.
Reclaiming the home
For a long time, I believed the lie that effective, meaningful ministry happened primarily outside the home. I poured myself into leading mothers’ groups and teaching Bible studies, all while leaving my home to suffer.
I was constantly overwhelmed, stretched thin, and playing catch-up, trying to “do it all.”
It wasn’t until the Lord brought two faithful believers into me and my husband’s lives that my mindset began to shift, and I came to truly understand what God’s Word had to say on the matter. It became clear to me that my home isn’t something to be managed around other ministries. It is the ministry.
As I began to take my calling as a ‘worker of the home’ seriously, hospitality and discipleship became not only possible but joyful.
Now, while my husband uses his everyday interactions with his co-workers and the athletes he coaches for evangelism, I have the privilege of creating a place for those conversations and relationships to grow and flourish.
I learned to embrace the steady work of preparation: training our children to share in the responsibility of caring for the home, thoughtfully planning meals that are easy to stretch to accommodate a few more around the table, and regularly setting aside a day or two each week to intentionally invite others into our home.
These small, unseen choices enable me to view the work of the home not as separate from ministry work but foundational to it. What once felt like a limitation has become one of the most life-giving expressions of God’s grace on our family.
When women fail to embrace their God-given roles, the Kingdom suffers. The home is not a lesser calling; rather, the home is the central place where a woman labors in ordinary faithfulness for the good of her family, the building of the church, and the glory of God.
In the wise words of R.C. Sproul, “We are called to be faithful, not famous.”
EDITOR’S NOTE — This article was written by Lauren Smith, who is a member of Abner Creek Baptist Church in Greer, South Carolina, and originally published by South Carolina’s Baptist Courier. She and her husband, Chris, have been married for nearly 15 years, and they have seven children.
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